Well
I haven’t really had much to say since I got back from holiday, hence my lack
of posting. I stopped writing while I
was away because, for a change the drama stopped so I’m happy to say that the rest
of the holiday went like a dream. In
total, I read a dozen books and generally did sweet FA for the whole time I was
away, in fact I got so lazy that towards the end that I didn’t even get in the
pool/sea because I’d have to reapply my suntan lotion and I simple couldn’t be
bothered!
So
what have I been up to? Well as the
title suggests, I’ve have had another date.
I can’t say that I’ve been trying very hard at the online stuff again, I’m
still tending to dip in and out (I find that’s the easiest way to keep my
sanity) and every now and again, someone seemingly decent pops up and well, you’ve
gotta give it a go.
This
latest one (I only met him last Thursday) literally gave me his phone number
within a couple of emails and as you’ll know if you’re a regular reader, I hate
that email tennis and those inane, “How are you finding it on here?” or “Had
many dates?” questions (I’ve actually taken to replying to those by saying, “come
back to me when you have a more interesting question” ... ha ha ha, no wonder I
don’t get many dates, but it’s all so tiresome) so I was pleasantly surprised
at how quickly we moved from email, to talking, to a date.
He
rang me almost immediately when I sent my number (never ring them) so I also
thought that was a good sign. I was
working so didn’t have time to take the call (I didn’t want to appear too eager
either!) so we exchanged a couple of texts instead and agreed to talk on the
way home. In the texts he asked me where
I was working, so I told him and he said that he lived quite near, so if I
fancied it, why didn’t we meet after work that evening ... me “Err no, I have
plans this evening” you just can’t ever appear that desperate!
So
good enough, he did ring me on the way home and we had a very pleasant chat and
agreed to meet on the Thursday (this was the Tuesday). The next day he did try to call a couple of
times, but I was really busy and didn’t get to chat to him, but I thought it
was nice that he had at least tried. I
know I’ve said it before, but I tend not to put too much effort in until you
actually meet them, otherwise you can spend a ridiculous amount of your precious
time conversing with an absolutely wanker.
Anyway,
date night came and while I was on my way there, he phoned to say that he was
running late. Somehow it didn’t bother
me and that’s very unusual. He asked me what
car I was driving and to wait in the car park for him. So, he turned up about 10 minutes later, I
had emails to do so wasn’t really bothered and parked next to me, well I was so
engrossed in my emails, I didn’t see him and jumped a bloody mile when he
knocked on the window.
First
impressions: pleasant face, tall (easily 6’) and slim, jeans, shirt, jacket (no
bum though). “Good start” I
thought. We found the entrance to the
pub (it wasn’t that easy) and ordered drinks which he paid for (another tick)
and we found some seats. This is where
it started to go wrong ... he decided we should sit on an oblong table and I
thought he’d sit opposite me, so I shifted along the bench thingy and he sat
down next to me ... right next to me ... right in my personal space and to make
matters worse, I was pushed into a corner (metaphorically and literally) and I
really don’t like that. 1. I don’t like
people I don’t know in my space, 2. I hate to feel trapped and there really was
nowhere for me to go.
In
retrospect, it was another one of those times where I really don’t know why I
didn’t say anything ... weird; I need to get a grip of that! So pretty much immediately he lurched in to
his whole history, all about the ex-wife, how he left her for a younger woman and
how bitter his wife is about it (“Afterall” he said, “she can’t be that’s
surprised, she is getting on a bit and doesn’t really look after herself”... I
kid you not) how much he sees his daughters and how much he wanted me to meet them
(easy tiger!) and then moved on to all the dates that he had had since he’d
joined the website.
In
short, within about 10 minutes, I knew everything I need to know about him:
He
expects a woman to buy a drink on the first date
He
doesn’t like it if a woman orders an expensive drink
He
expects a woman to go halves on the food on a first date
He
had an affair after 22 years of marriage and left his wife for her ... it didn’t
work out
His
wife is ‘getting on’ (in terms of years) and not attractive to him any more
(after she bore him two beautiful children)
His
businesses are worth £3m (means nothing – I know people with businesses worth
more than that and they’re personally stony broke)
He’s
not even started divorce proceedings
He
doesn’t work out
He
has a cat (I hate cats ... sorry to all you cat lovers)
He
thinks he’s good looking
He
wore a thick gold necklace (he didn’t tell me that, I saw it ... obv)
As
if the previous 10 points weren’t sufficient, the last one was enough to
completely put me off. As you can
imagine, there were huge back stories to the first 7 which I had to feign
interest in. I remember thinking, “If I wasn’t
hemmed in here, I’d have run by now” a bit like I did with my 17 minute date,
but for some reason I felt a bit paralysed and panic stricken! At one point he looked me up and down and
said, “Hmmmmm you’re very trim aren’t you?” Trim!!! Trim!!! Ewwwww *shudder*
After
about 50 minutes (... I know, I did really well) he asked what I was doing
later and if I wanted to have dinner with him.
Have you ever been in that situation and wondered how the hell the other
person can read the messages so wrongly?
Me, arms folded, legs crossed, knees pointing away from him, leaning as
far back and away from him as possible (he was so close I could smell his
breath, it was rank). You don’t need to
be a body language expert to realise when someone’s just not that into
you. I made up some lame excuse about
having to see a friend ... and he bought it!
God he loved himself – by this point, it simply hadn’t occurred to him
that I didn’t fancy him.
I
saw my chance to exit when he went to the loo.
As he came back, I was already standing up and I said, “Sorry, I’m going
to have to get going” Well you’d have thought I’d smacked him over the face
with a wet kipper. “What? Now?
Well I’ve had a lovely time, albeit a bit brief!” Me, “Sorry, we did only say we’d meet for a
drink” Him *stroppily* “Oh alright then, I suppose I can’t do anything to
persuade you” I didn’t answer.
So
we walked to the car park and to our cars when he swooped in for a full on lip
smacker. Well with lightening speed I
turned my head so he landed (a bit too sloppily for my liking) on my cheek – I can
still see the look of surprise on his face!
I then dived towards my car with him saying, “Shall I call you?” I think I was in the car before I hear the
end of the sentence and literally wheel screeched out of the car park.
Well,
obviously I wasn’t going to call him or text him and I didn’t hear anything
from him, although I suspected I might. He didn’t seem the kind of guy who
would take too kindly to being jibbed and would probably try again. However, I
didn’t hear from him that evening or the next morning so I thought that the
penny must have dropped after all. Around
lunchtime the next day, I got a text from him ... here it is with my reply...
Clearly
he didn’t like the fact that he’d been ‘dumped’ if you can dump someone after
one date, so decided to ‘dump’ me! Awwww
must’ve made him feel better after I hurt his pride ... bless. I blocked him after that so I don’t know
whether he sent me something back.
Right
lovelies, that’s me for another post. I
will try to be a bit more on the ball and promise to resume regular posting
soon. Until then, be fabulous!
Lots
of love
Jx
