The Dating Agency - Part 3

Well, before I start Part 3 of my Dating Agency escapades, I just need to take a moment to say how wonderful the weather was yesterday!  I’m completely blown away.  Considering it’s only February, it’s actually been 16/60 degrees, it usually only gets that warm in April/May.  It’s been absolutely beautiful and definitely worth a comment.  It makes you (well me really) feel so much better when the sun is shining and you can actually start to see an end to winter.  I even went and got my car cleaned and valeted (not done that since before Christmas ... I know it’s awful, I have a beautiful car which I love ... I really should treat it better!). Only another few weeks and the clocks change back to summer time too, so the nights will start getting lighter, faster.  Ahhhhhh *heaves a huge contented sigh* I’m in such a good mood!

OK, so enough of my positivity ... on to Date No 3 and the final date I bothered with from the dating agency...

Well, the usual thing happened (I think it was probably a couple of months or so after the last date) and I got a call from the agency.  You know the drill by now, so won’t go into it, but suffice to say, they had a match for me ... this guy was tall, had hair and (bonus) was a millionaire! “Oooooooh!” I hear you think (actually, though I hate to say it, the millionaire but doesn’t really impress me ... I know quite a few millionaires and apart from having a shed load of money, it doesn’t make them any nicer or better or more fun that you and I, they just have a bit more money to do it with).  So, I got his number, we texted and arranged to meet up, actually we met in the same place I’d met ‘Mr I love Me Who Do You Love’ (Date No 2).

I think I met him one evening after work from what I recall, and I have to say I was pleasantly surprised.  He was quite good looking, wore an expensive looking suit (without tie), he was tall, with that ‘silver fox’ type hair going on (I remember thinking “At last! This seems promising” This time we didn’t sit down but stood near the bar.  It actually started off quite pleasantly with him telling me all about himself (I find that happens with most of the men where the ‘date’ hasn’t worked out ... the man will talk absolutely none stop about himself and will throw in the odd question to me as an afterthought.  Now, I’m not saying that I want it to be all about me, I don’t, really I don’t, I just think it should be a bit more equal, you know, they tell you something, you tell them something ...  I hadn’t really noticed that was really an issue before writing this, but where the conversation has been equal, I’ve got on far better with that person ... hmmmmmm I’ll have to watch out for it in future). 

Anyway, he went on and on and on about himself, how much money he has, about his business and how he’s built them from nothing, about his mahoooosive house, about his wonderful friends, about how he loves to go to the races, how he loves to party, how he loves his ladies to be able to cook for his dinner parties (got the wrong person with me on that one!), how he likes his women to look (yes, honestly) how he has a chauffeur (I kid you not) who takes him everywhere so he can get drunk and not have to worry about anything.  Now, that last bit, in itself, I thought was quite sensible until it started to come out that he had a bit of a drink problem!  Great!

Now, I’ve already mentioned the ‘body language thing’ in my last post and how it’s one of the first things I notice about someone (in fact it is the first thing we all notice about a person, however, we usually don’t usually do it consciously ... you may do now that I’ve pointed it though) and one of the things I really hate (in fact, most people hate it too), is someone I don’t know or am not particularly close to, coming into my space ... you know when someone just gets so close that you can feel/smell their breath?  That’s TOO close!  Each time this guy got in my space, I’d take a step back and he’d keep taking a step towards me, I’d take a step back, he’d take a step towards me.  I kept doing this until I hit a post at the end of the bar and couldn’t move and further ... OMG he had me pinned in a corner and I just couldn’t breathe ... it was awful, just awful!

I HATE feeling like I’m backed into a corner, both metaphorically speaking and not!  Everything in my inner being was screaming “Get me out! Get me out!”  I remember actually feeling quite faint and making some excuse or other, then darting to the loos (bathroom), shut the toilet door and stood for a second with my back against the door taking big deep breaths.  Ooooh it was awful!  When I’d sufficiently pulled myself together, I exited and went back to him.  Gave him some story about needing to leave and left as quickly as I could.

I didn’t hear from him after that for a while, although I do recall him saying before I left that he’d be in touch and would take me for a meal over the next week or so ... to be honest, I don’t really remember too much about that, I was just desperate to get out of there.  It must have been a couple of months before he contacted me again (he’d obviously worked his way through all the women on the agency’s list, then came back round to me!).  He sent me a text saying something like, “Fancy that dinner then?”  I happened to be on holiday (yes, again) so didn’t bother replying.  For one, he was two months too late and second, I couldn’t bear another night out with the Listerine Dragon (remember him?).

After that, I remember getting all caught up with work (that tends to happen quite a bit) and kind of forgot about the whole dating thing.  Looking back, I should have got back in touch with the agency and cancelled or suspended my membership – I didn’t do either and never heard from them again.  Wow, talk about easy money ... I wish I managed to earn money so easily.

So that was my foray in to Dating Agencies.  I still haven’t done the speed dating thing I was talking about with Justine.  I’ll have to get in touch with her and get it arranged.

Right lovelies, that’s it for another episode of my crazy life.  Look forward to speaking to you again soon.  In the meantime, be fabulous.

Lots of love

Jx

PS Have a wonderful weekend!

The Dating Agency - Part 2

OK, so yesterday I told you about how I got to join a dating agency, the process of joining the agency and my first date.  Today I’m going to tell you about Date No 2 (I only had 3 all in all ... I’ll tell you about that tomorrow)...

Weeks after my first ‘Date’ (if you can call it that) I got a phone call from the agency to say that one of their members was interested in meeting me and he was a really good match.  They kind of half apologised for delay in getting back to me with another match, but said they were finding it hard to match me with my criteria (story of my life ... I’ve never really liked that word ‘compromise’ ... I don’t really do ‘compromise’ that word makes me shudder), however, they thought this guy was ideal. 

They ran through his details: good job, over 6’, full head of hair etc etc etc  (I’m actually finding that a man with a full head of hair who is over 40 is quite the exception ... I hadn’t really noticed this until I started internet dating and had access to the pictures of lots of over 40’s men ... my dad’s in his early 70’s and still has a full head of hair, so it’s never really occurred to me that people lose it ... anyway I’m digressing again). I double checked, as much as I could, that they were telling me the truth and they assured me they were.  I told them that they could give the guy my number.  This time when I checked him out online, he had a picture and looked quite nice.  Bonus!

The next day, he texted me, then we had a quick phone call.  He seemed nice.  He seemed normal.  Operative word ‘seemed’!  We arranged to meet on a Sunday morning, for coffee, at a local hotel that I know has a large bar/lounge area that I sometimes use for business meetings.  I turned up, hair all big and curly, huge heels (as usual), nice makeup (paired down cos it was a Sunday morning after all), skinny jeans and a oversized slouchy type thin knit – perfect for a Sunday morning.  I walked into the lounge and spotted him straight away.

This ‘lounge’ area is a typical hotel lounge.  You know the type, a mixture of settees, armchairs, hard chairs, small tables, tall tables ... a real mixture so you can choose depending on the type of meeting your having.  Well, this guy had chosen to position himself (I say ‘positioned’, but you should read ‘sprawled’) across a two seater settee.  Picture it ... he’s sitting square in the middle of it, with both arms outstretched across the back of it, one ankle on the other knee with all his tackle there to be seen.  Nice! (That’s a joke by the way ... the ‘nice’ bit!)

Now, I don’t know if you know anything about body language (unfortunately, I’m a bit of an expert), but that whole posture – the outstretched arms and the crotch of full display – absolutely screams “I love me, who do you love? ... and just look at my big crotch ... I’m virile and I know it ... come and get it baby!”

Well, if I’m entirely honest, that posture was enough to make me turn and run ... but no, I thought, give him a chance ... he might be really nice.  Now, because of the way the seating was arranged, I had to sit opposite him over a small coffee type table, on a hard tall backed chair (think dining chair ... you know, straight up and really uncomfortable so you end up perched on the end of it).  So, there’s him, sprawled across a comfy couch with me sitting opposite, perched on the edge of a considerably higher straight backed chair.  I can’t begin to tell you how uncomfortable I felt ... and I knew he knew how uncomfortable I was and I think he was loving every minute of it.  He had a kind of cocky grin on his face.  Oh, and before I sat down, he looked me up and down, not one of those little quick glances that someone hopes you don’t spot, but a full on slow gaze from feet to head.  Ewwwwwwwwwww, creepy b*****d.  Everything about the situation was screaming at the to “Run Forest, Run!”

Pretty much straight way the waitress came over and I ordered coffee, he then launched into telling me about his experience with the dating agency.  How he had his pick of the women and was going on a different date every day (sometimes more than one date in a day).  I just kinda sat there and listened, taking it all in (and actually, if I’m honest, thinking, “Tosser” – if you’re not British, you probably won’t get that term ... but let me tell you, it’s no term of endearment!).  When he’d finished telling me how many million dates he’d been on and was going on, together with how wonderful he was, he asked, “OK, so you’re blonde, slim and tall, what’s wrong with you that you can’t find a man?”

Well, you could have knocked me down with a feather ... I was totally shocked!  Now I can think of a million things I could say to him like eg “It’s difficult when the world’s filled with assholes like you” (I think that’s my favourite), but I was so shocked and he caught me so off guard that I just shrugged!  I just shrugged! OMG ... you don’t need to say anything, I’m stunned and annoyed at myself enough.  But as I say, he shocked the life out of me and I’m not always that good with words when I’m caught off guard ... well not in my personal life anyway ... don’t seem to have any problem in business.

Needless to say, after that, I was pretty much out of there.  However, the story doesn’t end there.  I mumbled that I needed to be somewhere and he said he’d walk me to my car ... again, why I didn’t say don’t bother, I don’t really know.  Anyway, he did, but as we walked towards my car, I stumbled and actually fell over (I can’t believe I’m telling you this bit ... it’s a bit embarrassing really).  What did he do?  Laughed.  He just stood there and laughed.  A guy who was walking past stopped and helped me up.  I didn’t say a word to the other idiot – just gave him a dirty look, thanked the guy who’d helped me, got into my car and drove away.  As I was driving home, my arm began to hurt more and more and to cut a long story short, turns out I’d broken my elbow!

The next day, with a very painful elbow, I again rang the agency and told them what I thought of my ‘date’ and how arrogant and nasty he was.  Their reaction, “Oh that’s strange, no-one else has said that about him, everyone seems to quite like him”.  I’m just not even going to go there with what I said to them or what my mood was like afterwards or what I thought about the women who “quite like him” ... although the word ‘desperate’ did come to mind!

So that, lovelies, is tale No 2.  I have one more to tell you about, which I’ll do tomorrow.  But here’s the heads up ... that didn’t end well either!  Until then lovely people, be fabulous.

Lots of love

Jx

The Dating Agency - Part 1

OK so, I said that I’d tell you about my little foray into using a Dating Agency.  Well, here goes ...

When I was on holiday one time (I think I was in the Dominican Republic ... lovely place.  Some people think it's a bit 'Second Rate Caribbean' but I love it there!) I was saying how fed up I was being single, and I really needed to do something about it.  One of the people I was on holiday with recommended this dating agency based in Manchester.  The ‘hook’ that made these people different from other agencies (or so I was lead to believe) was that they actually got you to fill in a very detailed questionnaire about you and about the type of person you were looking for.  They also interviewed you face to face and (I think this was the bit that sold it to me) took up references on each of their ‘members’ to ensure that they were who they said they were.

Now obviously, that kinda service doesn’t come cheap, but I thought that they seemed really comprehensive, especially after I’d researched them on their website when I got home.  They promised to match you with like minded people who had thoroughly been investigated beforehand, so I thought it must be worth the money.  Also, it did cross my mind that if men were willing to pay that kind of money, then they must be serious about finding someone special, rather than looking for a quick fling.  OMG how naive you can be?  But hey, you live and learn and sometimes you’ve got to try these things for yourself!

So, after having a good old mooch around their website, I gave them a call and was told that I’d need to come in to their offices, or they could come to my house or office for a full face to face interview type thing.  I elected to go to their offices, a very swanky place at Salford Quays.  I was shown into a little interview room that contained lots of ‘Thank You’ cards (obviously, to my mind looking back, they were completely staged to make you think these guys are good at matching you with your ideal partner ... how wrong can you be!?) then was left to fill in the longest questionnaire I think I’ve ever done. 

It went in to every detail of my appearance, what I liked to do in my spare time, the music I like, the activities I do ... well you get the idea.  Then I had to complete another section about the type of guy I was looking for.  Again, it was extremely detailed down to the colour of their eyes, their height, hair colour, type of clothes, music, sports ... everything pretty much including inside leg measurement.

As I was completing the form, I remember thinking what a pain in the ass it was, but how wonderful it was that they wanted so much detail.  With that much detail, they must really made sure that the people they match me with are pretty spot on!  Next, I had a really detailed interview with some bloke (can’t remember his name now) but looking back, he was the usual pushy sales bloke ... I cannot believe how I didn’t spot it.  I meet these people every day and am always wary of them – maybe because this was about something personal rather than business ... note to self, apply your business sense when dealing with personal issues!

He told me that I could log on to their website and put my picture up there so that when they sent me matches through, we would be able to see pictures of each other.  So, with the questionnaire completed (together with my references!) the interview done and my rather substantial cheque in the guy’s grubby mitt, I left their offices with a spring in my step and a smile on my face.  I was more pleased with myself that I’d actually bothered to get off my backside and do something about being single than anything else.

Then I waited.  And waited.  And waited.  A few weeks later (now I’m a little bit hazy on details on all this stuff, because it was a while ago) I got a phone call from one of the ladies in their office to say that they had a good match for me.  They had told him all about me and he was interested so did I want to hear about him?  Well of course I bloody did ... that’s what I was paying them for!  She told me (from what I can remember) he was 6 feet tall, athletic build, blonde hair, blue eyes, good job – to be honest, I can’t remember much past that - knowing me, that was probably enough!  So I said, “Yes, he sounds nice, you can give him my number”.

That afternoon, they guy texted me and that evening we had a quick chat.  At the end we agreed to meet on the following Sunday afternoon for a quick drink (I said that I have a family get together to go to, so couldn’t be long ... good bloody job as it turned out).  We arranged to meet at a pub that he thought was somewhere between where we both lived.  In reality, it was near to where he lived, but I didn’t mind, I knew where it was and knew it was a safe place.

I got there bang on time, tottered up to the front door and he was actually waiting outside.  Good job really because I’d never have recognised him from the description the agency gave me of him (I had tried to look at his picture online, but he didn’t have one.  Now I know why ...).  He was about 5’9”, now I’m 5’6” and always wear 5” heels so anything under 5’10” is not ideal, he was, erm, how can I put it nicely ... FAT ... and yes he was blonde (I’d said that I didn’t mind about hair colour), but he also had a huge bald patch on the back of his head (think Friar Tuck from Robin Hood and you get the idea), he was wearing a band tour t-shirt (now that in itself I have no problem with, however ... ) with a zip up cardigan (now I’m not talking trendy zip up cardi here ... I’m talking ‘Granddad’ zip up cardi) he also word baggy, misshapen jeans and tennis pumps.  Now, I know that look can actually look good on some guys ... on this guy ... no ... he was F.A.T.!!!!!!

Now, before you start thinking, “Ewwww she’s a bit picky and shallow” let’s go back to what I put on my form – the form I filled out when I joined the agency ... you know, the agency I’m paying a lot of money to and I had complete a comprehensive questionnaire for, as well as sitting though at least an hour’s worth of their questioning to ensure that they “matched me up with the right people” – yeah, that agency:

Hair colour   No preference

Hair type      Full head of hair

Body type    Athletic/Slim/Average

Height         5’10 and above

Nowhere, absolutely nowhere, I mean nowhere do I recall putting:

Hair type     Full head of hair with a bald patch at the back reminiscent of Friar Tuck, Robin Hood’s mate

Body type    FAT

Height         Think ‘Santa’s little helper’

OMG – shoot me now!  Well I was in and outta there quicker than a fiddler’s elbow.  My diet coke didn’t even touch the sides.

As you can imagine, I rang the agency first thing the next day and gave them what for.  Not that they were bothered.  As far as they were concerned, they were fulfilling their quota (I forgot to mention that in their terms and conditions, they agreed to offer a certain number of matches for your consideration – not their fault if you don’t like the people when you meet them - and there’s the catch ladies and gents!).

It was a few weeks before I heard from the agency again.  I’ll tell you about the next one tomorrow.  Must fly now because I’m starving (well not literally ... obviously ... but I am very hungry).  Until next time lovely people, be fabulous!

Lots of love

Jx

PS I forgot to mention that the ageny never took up my references (I know that because I ran the department that would have received the request.  So if they didn't do it for me, they probably don't do it for anyone!)

Saturday Night - Part 2

Hello lovelies

Well, you’ll be glad to hear that I’m feeling a million times better today ... yay!  So without further ado, back to my Saturday night tale...

I got out of the taxi and went into the extremely crowded pub and luckily spotted my cousin Phil at the end of the bar.  The bar is called O’Neills (an Irish bar, obviously!) and is extremely busy on a weekend night as they have live music and the beer’s good and reasonably priced.  Next to arrive where three of Helen’s friends that I haven’t seen since school (Helen was a couple of years below me and went to the same school) that was Sarah, Grazia and Suzanne.  It was so lovely to see them, although, somehow, I didn’t manage to spend much time talking to them that night.  I don’t really know why, I think it was because the bar was so packed that we seemed to get separated.  The time went by really quickly too ... don’t you just hate that?  The whole night actually only felt about an hour long!  Next to arrive was a friend of Helen’s sisters, Angela – a really lovely girl that I met the week before at Helen’s family birthday party ... she asked my dad for a dance and he hasn’t stopped talking about it since – bless.

Then I get a text from Helen ... she’s in the taxi (on her way from Manchester, which is about a 35 minute drive) and the taxi’s lost.  Lost?!  How the hell can you get lost with Sat Nav?  Looks well when the Birthday girl isn’t at her own birthday! Lol Phil tried to ring her and got voicemail, I rang her and got a rather stressed sounding cousin, “Are you OK?” “Err, yeah.  Ring you back” then she was gone.  Blimey, I thought, hope they’re OK she didn’t sound a bit like herself. About another 20 minutes later, they walked in with Phil looking rather stressed!

Turns out that Helen (who hasn’t lived in my town for years) decided to tell the taxi driver a ‘quicker route’ rather than using his Sat Nav!  Awww at least they made it in the end.  She came with more lovely people that I hadn’t met before, Louise (lovely Irish girlie ... we actually had loads in common having both gone to Catholic Convent Schools ... she was a real hoot.   I’m looking forward to seeing her again soon) Julie and Patrick.  Julie was lovely too and a bit of a rock chick (we used to go to some of the same clubs, back in the day).  Unfortunately, I never managed to chat to Patrick.

So we spent a few lovely hours listening to some live music, having a good old gossip and drinking a few yummy wines (that last bit might have just been me!).  I have to say, that as I hadn’t been so well that week and following my appalling display of drunkenness the week before, I decided to cool it with the old vino this weekend.  I know, I know, boring bugger, but hey when your hangovers take nearly a week to get over, you know it’s time to knock it on the head!

We then decided to walk up the road to Phil’s other bar, The Green Bar.  I’d been a bit cocky that night and decided not to wear a coat (well I was wearing a dress with sleeves!).  I hate having a coat with me on a night out.  They’re such a burden.  I have a tendency to leave umbrella’s everywhere I go and they’re only a tenner a shot - I can guarantee you that my coats/jackets are all a damn sight more expensive than that - so didn’t want to take the risk.  Mistake though ... big mistake ... it was bloody freezing!

When we eventually (due to my hobble type walk) got to that bar, OMG it was so busy! It’s quite small in comparison to the bar we’d just left and you really couldn’t move.  You can tell I haven’t been doing much bar surfing lately can’t you?  I’m not used to all that jostling and intimate contact with complete strangers – ewwwwwww- a nice meal and few glasses of wine is more my style lately.  Anyway, eventually, we managed to bag a table and plonk our bums down (well, some of us at least!).  My feet were on fire due to those mahooosive heels I was wearing, so it was bliss to take the weight off.  I’d love to say that I carried on drinking, but I didn’t.  I thought I’d have one coke and then go back on the wine.  Turns out I was really quite enjoying my coke and watching everyone around me get drunker and drunker.  I don’t think I’ve ever done that before ... it was quite amusing!

I think it was about 12.30 when Helen announced that her sister, Pat, had arrived to pick her up, Louise, Julie and Patrick up.  After a bit of persuasion, we managed to coax Pat in for a drink so it was nice to have a little catch up with her too.  After long, protracted goodbyes, they left; followed by Sarah and Grazia (Suzanne had left earlier in the evening).  That left just Phil, Angela and me.  I all of a sudden felt really tired (funny how it hits you all of a sudden!) so said my goodbyes and hobbled out to the taxi rank, which thankfully was literally next door to the bar.  I definitely couldn’t have walked any further ... ouch!

As I was fully alert (due to my moderate drinking), I actually remember getting home this week and I’d been thoroughly organised and had a sandwich and crisps waiting for me for take away those midnight munchies you get when you’ve been drinking.  How organised of me ... well I thought so!  I always worry when I forget to do that, as no matter how much I’ve had to drink, I always want something to eat when I get in and as I don’t usually have a well stocked fridge or cupboards, it usually ends up being toast and I have visions of burning the house down one day, in my drunken stupor!

Needless to say, I didn’t wake up with a hangover the next day as I’d been good with my drinking. I however, did have my lovely bout of laryngitis (no doubt down to the amount of strain I put on my vocal chords shouting over the music the night before) and chest infection.  Things could have been so much worse though ... I could have had a hangover on top ... now THAT would have been bad *shudder*.

So that, my lovelies was my night out with fabulous family and friends.  Quite uneventful by my standards, but absolutely lovely and thoroughly enjoyable.  I’m totally, stunned, thrilled and generally over the moon with all the new people, friends and family I’ve met up with over the last 2 weeks.  I honestly can’t believe it.  One of my New Year’s resolutions was to get out more and meet new people.  Well, I can honestly say I’ve been doing that, with gusto .... and I’m bloody loving it!

Well, that’s it for today I’m afraid.  I’ll try and come up with something interesting for tomorrow.  I don’t think I ever told you about the time I joined a dating agency did I?  Hmmmmmmm that might be my next post!

Until then lovely people, be fabulous.

Lots of love

Jx

General Update & Thank You

Hello lovelies

OK, OK, I know, I know, I’ve been really remise again and not been keeping things up to date, so sorry ... but I’ve been a busy bee (well, sort of!!).

Firstly, before I go any further I’ve got to do the traditional THANK YOUs as I’ve now reached over the 1700 hits mark ... amazing and again, I’m super thrilled.  I have wonderful readers from all over the world with the top four (in descending order) being UK, USA, Russia, Spain.  I’ve also had some fantastic feedback about my blog over the weekend (I’ll tell you about that later), so I’m really happy right now (even more than usual!).  THANK YOU MY LOVELIES!

So, what have I been up to?  Well, I didn’t manage to meet up with my cousin, Helen, on Thursday because I haven’t been feeling too well, a bit of a cold is all (well, that’s what I thought then) so didn't manage to make it.  I was thought I was feeling a bit better on Friday, so  asked my fab dad if he wanted to get some lunch (I forgot in my last post to put a picture of the roses he bought me for Valentine’s Day, so I’ve put it below).  However, when we got to the pub (the Bottle and Glass ... a lovely little country pub I think I’ve mentioned before) I started to get major hot sweats.  Now, for someone who is always cold (hence my love of hot countries) it’s very unlike me to get hot.  It just doesn't happen ... ever. 

Valentine Flowers from my Wonderful Dad

Initially, I just thought it was because I had had been running around the house with the heating on before my dad came round.  I said to my Dad, “Blimey Dad, is it hot in here?  I’m burning up?” He said it wasn’t but it could be because I was sitting next to a radiator, so we swapped places, but it didn’t help a bit.  I had to fan myself with the menu.  I said to my Dad, “This is weird dad ... I’m so hot.   I’m having a hot flush!”  Then it occurred to me, “Oh God Dad, do you think I’m going through the change?” (well, I’m nothing if not dramatic) my Dad spat into his pint of bitter shandy and laughed his head off!  “Nice ... thanks Dad” says I, “No love, you’re most likely coming down with something, you’re far too young for that nonsense”, “Phew!  Thanks Dad ... love you”

Anyway, we ordered our food with my temperature soaring (we both had wild boar burgers ... my dad hadn’t had wild boar before ... yum yum yum very tasty, he loved it).  The minute we’d finished our food (I hardly touched mine) I said, “Sorry Dad, I’ve gotta go, I feel awful”.  So we paid and departed.  I think we’d only been there 45 minutes.  Usually we have a nice leisurely lunch and at least a couple of drinks, but not that day ... I couldn’t wait to go, I was feeling really faint and hot ... Oh so hot!

When I got home, although I was hot I made a hot water bottle (I LOVE hot water bottles ... I always have.  They’re my comfort blanket and usually sort out any kind of ailment from headache to period pain .... they’re a regular cure all.  I have loads of them too ... from tiny hand ones, to small heart shaped ones, to my favourite of the moment that Deb got me for Christmas ... an extremely soft leopard print fur one ... I love it!) and collapsed on the couch with my dad and watched a film for a couple of hours.  As the day wore on, I felt worse and worse, so I decided to have a nice early night, as I was supposed to be taking Devon to Legoland the next day for her birthday treat and I really didn’t want to miss it.

Well, when I woke up the next morning, it was quite clear that I wasn’t going anywhere. I was losing my voice and one of those awful bone rattling coughs. Apart from anything else, I couldn’t forgive myself if I passed anything on to her or any other littleuns, so I reluctantly had to ring Deb and cancel.  I hated letting that lovely little girl down ... we’d both been looking forward to it so much, but it couldn’t be helped. Ho Hum.  Hopefully, we’ll manage to get there this weekend instead.

I went back to sleep then ... again, you can tell when I’m not well, it’s the only time I can bear to lie in bed after around 9.00 am (either that or when I’ve got jet lag).  When I did get up, I nipped to the chemist and got some Day Nurse/Night Nurse capsules and pretty much straight away started to feel better.  Those things are amazing ... highly recommended for any kind of colds/flu and the night ones help you sleep too.  Fantastic.  They’re that good that by 6.00 pm I was feeling almost back to my normal self, which was really good news considering that it was my cousin, Helen’s birthday do that night and I really didn’t want to miss it ... I’d bought a new dress for the occasion as well (a fab little black slinky number from All Saints ... You know how much I love that shop). 

So, feeling much better (and apart from not wanting to let Helen down, I was looking forward to meeting up with some of her friends whom I haven’t seen since I left school) I hopped in the shower, did my make-up (including a fab new pair of Ardell false lashes ... haven’t tried that make before ... they’re wonderful ... oh, and digressing a bit, if you have trouble with applying falsies and getting them to stick, I highly recommend using MAC lash glue, it’s £10 but so worth it ... you can use cheaper lashes as long as you use a decent glue – its amazeballs – and use a lash applicator ... Ardell’s is brilliant and make it so much easier than trying to apply them by hand.  You can get the applicators from Superdrug or I got mine off eBay) and hair, got dressed and accessorized and actually felt pretty good (I think the tablets had lulled me in to a false sense of security!). 

Once I was ready (and after I’d done my usual little chant/war cry into the mirror, “More than mortal man deserves!”  It’s just something I’ve always done ... can’t remember where I got that from, but it kinda makes me feel good) I double checked that my cousin, Phil, was in the pub where we were meeting (which happens to be one of his pubs), hopped in a taxi .... and I think I’ll leave it there for today lovelies.

I’ll tell you all about our lovely evening tomorrow ... I’m feeling a bit weary now.  That ‘little cold’ has actually developed into full on laryngitis and a quite nasty chest infection.  Actually, I’m not feeling really ill, which is good, however, I am dosed to the eyeballs on Day Nurse, honey, lemon and cough medicine... I just can’t speak (some would say that’s a good thing!) and have a nasty barking cough, which sounds really odd coupled with the laryngitis.

Actually, it’s quite weird when you live on your own and can’t speak, cos I keep forgetting.  While I was sitting idly this morning watching Day Time TV (I know, I know, it’s that thing I’ve said I’d never do ... watch Day Time TV ... I think I’ve said it before, Day Time telly is like the tractor beam from Star Trek ... it draws you in and you can’t turn away from it – you can turn on the TV at 9.00 am and before you know it, it’s 1.30 pm and Loose Women is just finishing and you’re still sitting there drooling down your dressing gown.  It’s all a bit white trash really ... I do, however, completely draw the line at watching Jeremy Kyle .... revolting man) I decided to have a go at This Morning’s weekly completion to win £30K and rang up as instructed in order to give the totally obvious answer to their question, then realised I couldn’t give the answer cos I couldn’t speak! Lmao ... mad woman.  I still entered though ... I texted my answer instead.  Thank God for multi media cos I’ve got a good feeling about this.  I’ve never really done any of those competitions before, but someone has to win and I’ve as good a chance as anyone else!  I'll keep you informed.

Oh God ... on reading that last paragraph back, I really am getting sucked in aren’t I?  What was  I thinking!  Day Time TV, entering competitions ... Blimey, I’ll be going the Bingo next! pmsl.

Right lovelies, that’s me for today.  Check in tomorrow and I’ll tell you all about my lovely Saturday night out and the fab friends I’ve met, both old and new.  Until then, be fabulous!

Lots of love

Jx

Family, Blackpool & Valentines

Hello Lovelies

Well, what a busy week.  Fantastic, but busy!

In my last post I mentioned that I had a lot going on this week and I can honestly say that I’ve had one of the best weeks I can ever remember (and that’s saying something!).

Friday, I met with two of my friends from school, Jo and Sharon.  Now, bearing in mind, it’s actually 26 years since I’ve seen these girls (I left school at 16 and went to college), in Sharon’s words, “It was like I’d gone to the loo and returned 20 years later!”  It really was like we’d only seen each other yesterday.  It was so weird.  We met at 7.15 pm and unfortunately, Sharon had to leave at 9.15 pm and I have honestly never known time fly by so quickly.  It was like we’d only been talking to 10 minutes when she had to leave.  Jo and I stayed a bit longer, which I thought was only about another half an hour, but was actually an hour and a half!

How bazaar it is that you can not see someone for 20+ years, but you fall immediately back into the same rhythm.  It was so lovely to see them both and they haven’t changed a bit.  We’re definitely doing it again soon ... it won't be 20 years again!

Saturday night I went to Debi and Devon’s, and the lovely Sarah and Pam where there too.  We had a gorgeous Chinese takeaway and a proper good old gossip.  I got there are 5 pm and left at 1 am!  My goodness me, I don’t really know where the time is going lately.  You know what they say, “Time flies when you’re having fun!”

Sunday, I went with my lovely dad to my cousin, Helen’s 40^th Birthday Party with the family.  We had a wonderful time and I again caught up with a lot of my long lost cousins (I have LOADS of them) who I haven’t seen for around 20 years. It was fab!

As the party was in the afternoon, I dropped my dad off in the early evening and went out with my cousin Phil and his son Josh (Josh is 18! 18 and I’ve not met him before ... did I tell you that our family hasn’t exactly been close!).  Well, I can definitely say that I don’t think I’ve ever been that drunk!  It was tonnes of fun though and I loved every minute of it (well, what I can remember of it!).  However, I couldn’t get out of bed, at all, the next day!  It was 3.00 pm before I could manage to go downstairs to get a drink!

Phil rang me in the afternoon to see if I wanted to go out for tea and meet his other kids, but I couldn’t do it! (It’s definitely bad if I turn down food ... especially Italian!).

Tuesday (yesterday) I finally managed to drag myself out of bed and drive to up Blackpool to meet Debi, Devon and Debi’s mum, Carol (they decided to have a mini holiday during half term) and spend the day with them as it was Devon’s birthday.  We had a really lovely day, although, I have to say it was absolutely freezing in Blackpool (for those of you who don’t know it, it’s on the coast of the North Sea so isn’t known for its good/warm weather, especially in the dead of winter.  We didn’t let the weather get us down though and we had a great time.  When I got home, I got a wonderful surprise, my dad had been round and left a beautiful bouquet of red roses for me (it was Valentine’s Day and he didn’t want me to go without!  I love my dad, he rocks!)

Tomorrow, I’m hoping to catch up and have a quick coffee with Helen (whose birthday it is this week and who I’ll be going out with on Saturday night, together with her friends and some family).  Also on Saturday, I’m taking Devon to Legoworld for another Birthday treat.  Phew ... I can’t keep up with myself!

As for the dating stuff, well, I haven’t really bothered with it.  I’ve been too busy.  But here are a couple of mails for your amusement!

Subject:                XXXXXX

Message:     god i wish i was more attractive lol xxxxx  am i your type??? im house trained lol xx

 

[And another from the same guy ... and before you wonder why I haven’t replied, he’s only 26 ... shame, at least he has a sense of humour even if he can’t write!]

Subject:                XXXXXXXXXX

Message:    ok lets tell you all about me lol xxxxx im scott, im single (obviously). i used to be a business manager for volkswagen for 8 yrs, but i now design bathrooms.
i have no kids, no pets and i dont smoke. i live all on my own, well actually i live with a gay ghost..... he keeps putting the willies up me lol xxxxx

Subject:      Wow!!!!!

Message:     You are a very hot bomb !! certainly got me ticking x

Subject:       Hello

Message:     Hello
I am an intelligent, articulate ,educated,interesting ,loyal, loving man.
I am divorced with two grown and married daughters.I run my own company which involves some travel abroad . I'm looking for a loving,sexy ,intelligent lady for fun and goodtimes initially and see if it develops into something more meaningful and committed.

                   I have never smoked and hate it, only drink socially and then generally at WE.I do like to take my lady for a good meal and a bottle of good red.
I struggle to take paracetamol so drugs are a total no no for me,legal or otherwise. I am quite tactile and have no problem showing affection either by holding hands or the occasional surreptitious kiss,but generally keep the kissing for private intimate times, but your friends will certainly know that I am an alpha male and would be your man.
I am 6 ft tall,13st5lbs (85kg) Medium build,no beer gut, have all my own teeth and hair.
I am a keen country lover and enjoy flyfishing,walking,cycling,motorcycling and most sports except darts.
Would you like to meet up for coffee and a chat, venue and time your choice.
Look forward to hearing from you
All the best for now

[I’ve had a similar one from this guy before – he’s 64 ... I recognised the bad typing, lack of grammar and the fact that he has most of his own teeth and hair!  The drugs bit is new ... I’m guessing he’s had a couple of bad encounters and decided to include that bit!]

Oh, and I keep getting mails from men telling me that they don’t bite?!  It had actually never crossed my mind that they might!

Right lovelies, that’s me again for now ... more soon.  Until then, be fabulous!

Lots of love

Jx

Movies, Dating and Catch Ups ...

Hello lovelies

Apologies again for the severe lack of posts ... I haven’t been up to much worth mentioning in the last few days – apart from having a lovely dinner and a catch up with my fab friends, Jenny and Steve on Sunday.  We had a yummy curry and a good old gossip ... can’t beat it!

I’ll hopefully be able to rectify my lack of activity in the next couple of weeks as I’ve got all kinds of fun stuff going on:

·         I’m meeting some friends on Friday I haven’t seen for over 20 years (not telling you exactly how long, cos it’s scary!!!!) – can’t wait to see them and we have one whole load of catching up to do.

·         It’s my cousin, Helen’s 40th Birthday party with the family on Sunday (and I’ll be going with my lovely dad) – I haven’t seen Helen or a lot of the people who’ll be there, for about 20 years either ... so lots more catching up there!

·         It’s Devon’s birthday on Tuesday (Valentine’s Day) and I’m off to visit her and her mum in Blackpool where they’ll be having a well earned break.

·         That next Saturday, I’m taking Devon on another little shopping trip (you remember how much she loved it when we went before Christmas to buy her party dress?).  Can’t wait for that ... she’s such good company.

·         That night it’s Helen’s girlie 40^th night out – and we’re going to a bar owned by another cousin that I haven’t seen for years too.

So, all in all, I’ve got one hell of a lot of catching up to do with friends and family over the next couple of weeks and I can’t wait!  God love Facebook is all I can say.  I’d probably never been in touch with my family and definitely not my friends if not for finding them on there.  Yay Facebook!

Well, as I said, I’ve not really been up to much apart from the gym and movies.  I’ve seen a couple of new films this week:

‘Chronicle’ is a sci-fi, nerdy, superhero type film (very suited to teenage boys it has to be said).  Three young guys find a glowing object in a cave and touch it – afterwards, they discover that they have superhuman powers eg flying, moving things through telekinetics etc.  One of the guys can’t handle his new power, so flips and causes mayhem.  I won’t say too much more in case you want to see it, but that’s pretty much the plot.  I did actually enjoy it more than I expected to though.

‘Man on a Ledge’ was a complete surprise!  I hadn’t read/heard the best reviews about it but as you know, I never let that put me off and I was really glad it didn’t.  It was fast paced, with lots of twists and turns and literally, towards the end of the film, had me on the edge of my seat (now that doesn’t happen very often!).  The plot surrounds an ex-cop who’s been framed by a billionaire for stealing his £40m diamond.  The ex-cop goes out on a ledge in the hotel opposite the millionaire’s offices and causes a commotion so that his brother can break in a find the diamond.  I don’t think I’ve given anything away there, cos I knew that before I saw it.  It was excellent.  Extremely fast moving with lots of twists and turns.  Go check that one out!

Last week, I don’t think I mentioned that I saw ‘The Descendants’ – the film that George Clooney’s been nominated for an Oscar for.  Not very good.  More than a bit depressing.  The premise is that his wife is in a coma after a freak boating accident and he’s left to manage his wayward kids.  There’s obviously more to it than that, but I don’t want to spoil it if you’re going to watch it.  Considering the amount of films I watch, that’s one I wouldn’t recommend ... keep it for DVD.

There are tonnes of new films out this week that I’ll definitely be watching:

·         Star Wars: Episode 1 in 3D (I’m not a fan of the later Star Wars films – although I loved the two very early ones - and this isn’t a brand new one, but they’ve put it into 3D and as I have my ‘unlimited’ pass, I may check that one out)

·         Ghost Rider – I haven’t seen any of the previous ones, but I’ve seen the trailer for this and it actually looks quite cool

·         The Woman In Black – new Daniel Ratcliffe film (I’m not a fan of his – I don’t think he’s a very good actor, very wooden – but this is a horror, my favourite genre, so it’s worth a peek)

·         The Muppet Show – speaks for itself (I’m a huge fan!)

·         The Vow – a married couple have a car crash and when she comes round, she can’t remember who he is and he has to go about getting her to fall in love with him all over again (ahhhhhhhhh).

So I think I’ll be a bit busy.  By the way ... I’ve knocked the hot dog and Peanut M&Ms on the head.  I finally got round to checking out how many calories each contain and you’re not going to believe this .... the hot dog = 650 ... Peanut M&Ms = 1000!!!! OMG I nearly fainted when I read that, so it’s just diet cokes for me now.  I’m gutted! Lol

OK, now dating update ... again, not much to report, but I thought you may like to see a few more of the more whacky emails.  Oh and just to explain what happens on the internet dating site I’m on (in case you don’t know how internet dating works ... Steve, this is in answer to your question) ...

1.   You register

2.   You fill in a profile about yourself

3.   You upload pictures of yourself

4.   You can then search for people either through a filter ie people who live in your area, as specific age range, hair/eye colour, likes and dislikes or the site gives you suggestions of people who may be suitable.

5.   You then either wink at them - or the site's equivalent to winking - (to let them know you like them ... I can’t really see the point of this) or they wink at you, or you can send them a mail/they send you a mail directly to an inbox on the site (that way, you don’t need to give out your personal email address, it’s all done on the site).

Just one point of note here – most dating sites will let you join, do your profile/upload pictures and search for people you fancy for free, however, if you want to contact someone or read any mails that you may have received, you have to pay the site subscription fees.  I understand that plentyoffish.co.uk is free, but really wouldn’t do for me.  I wouldn’t want a man that couldn’t or wouldn’t pay subscription fees!  However, if you’re on a tight budget, it may be worth a go!)

6.   If you get a mail, you can obviously reply or delete it.

If someone bugs you and you don’t want to hear from them again, there’s usually a facility where you can ‘blacklist’ them so that they can’t contact you anymore.  Also, if someone is really out of order, you can report them to the administrators of the site and they’ll deal with it.  I hope that all makes.  Sometimes take it for granted that people know what I’m talking about until I’m asked! 

So, on to this week’s more entertaining mails:

Email 1

Subject:      Let’s do it – you know you want to!

Message:    Fancy a sh*g? [No I flamin’ don’t, dirty bugger – DELETE/BLACKLIST]

Email 2

Title:           Hey Secksy! [Secksy???? What the hell?]

Message:    Hey how are you x have u met anyone yet xx [Dunno about me, I bet you haven’t with an opening title like that! DELETE]

Email 3

Title:           Hi

Message:    good morning.....

i like the finer things in life...

                   however,
i dont have thousands to waste on shopping, expensive clothes etc,.

[blimey, that’s me told!] most of my earnings go on my passion - motor racing, [what he’s saying is he’s a tight wad and wants a woman but doesn’t want to spend any money on her and is warning me in advance!  Awwwww that’s kinda thoughtful really ... NOT!] and my cars ( i have a few), but also i like to eat out [wonder if he means McDonalds?], have weekends away and love travelling [do you think he means staying in Youth Hostels to keep the price down?].

i like the simple things in life, like gardening, walking and cooking rather than shopping aimlessly for hours [Oh dear ... he really has a bee up his bum about shopping doesn’t he!].
so, if you are still interested, give me a shout... [Er, that’ll be a ‘no’ – DELETE]

Email 4

Subject:      Clusterbomb [What the hell’s a ‘Clusterbomb’?]

Message:    Hiya. Confident smile and a sassy profile. All working in yr favour xx [Err, thanks? What are you supposed to say to that?]

Email 5

Subject:      Hi

Message:    Were you born on 24 July at a guess ? V. close to mine if so. [My profile quite clearly states I’m a Piceas and my birthday’s in March ... weird question!]

Many restaurants in Manchester that are excellent. Piccoloino, San Carlo & Stock to name a few. Ever been to any of those ? [What has that got to do with anything?]

Where were you on holiday.....as in the photo ? [I’m not gonna tell you, cos you’re just plain weird! DELETE]

Email 6

Subject:      hi

Message:    helo [another great speller!] hope you had a good day , mine was bit boring [what a weird thing to say in a first email!?] , very much would love to get to know ya [would ya now? DELETE]

Ho hum ... never mind ... I’ll keep going (God loves a trier!)

Right lovelies, that’s me for another day ... I need some food and want to watch the first episode of the new season of True Blood (God I love that programme ... all those buff vampires and warewolves ... yummy! lol).  I hope you’re having a wonderful week, enjy the rest of it.  Until next time, be fabulous!

Lots of love

Jx