A week or so ago, I was a bit
bored and decided to put my cinema card to good use and watch a Silent
House. I’d seen the trailer and it
looked OK, however, I’d seen reviews and they were pretty poor but I was
completely unprepared for quite how bad it really was! You know that I tend to ignore reviews as I’ve
seen some films that I thought were really good that have had appalling write
ups, however, this one was truly appalling.
So much so, that I fell asleep about 10 minutes in for at least half an
hour of it only to be rudely woken every time the heroine screamed!
That really bugged me actually,
because she wasn’t screaming at anything scary from what I could see and I’d
have much rather been left to sleep all the way through! The last 45 minutes that I saw were
particularly rubbish. Another rather
annoying thing was that it was shot in that ‘Blair Witch’ stylie ie hand held,
rather shaky, camera.
So what’s the film about? A young woman finds herself sealed inside her
family’s secluded lake house. With no
contact with the outside world and no way out, panic turns in to terror (I didn’t
find it very terrifying I have to say!) as events become increasingly ominous
in and around the house.
I pinched that wording from
Flixster. Makes it sound quite good
doesn’t it? It’s not. There is a bit of a major twist at the end –
don’t worry, I’m not gonna give it away – but it really wasn’t worth it. I know the sign of a particularly bad film
now ... if I fall asleep in the first 10 minutes; it’s a pretty good indication...
I NEVER fall asleep in good films! Here’s
the trailer in case you’re interested - it makes it look better and more scary than
it is! (Guys you may want to watch it for the tailer!)...
Well, when that film finished, I
really didn’t fancy going home (is that sad?
Don’t care!) I decided to watch the only other film that I hadn’t seen, ‘Safe’. Now, if you’ve read my previous reviews, you’ll
know I’m in no way a fan of Jason Statham when he’s attempting an American
accent. To put it bluntly, it’s piss
poor ... shockingly bad ... he really needs a better language coach. However, it was the only film that I hadn’t
seen so thought I’d give it ago ... I could always go home or fall asleep if it
really was rubbish.
However, I was pleasantly
surprised. His accent wasn’t as bad as
normal; the worst snippets of his poor accent are in the trailers! That’s a bad move by the movie promoters as
it will put so many people off watching it.
So, what’s the film about? Well,
a second-rate cage fighter blows a rigged fight and as a result the Russian
Mafia kills his wife and banishes him from his existing life. He then witnesses a Chinese girl being chased
by the same Mafia who killed his wife and helps her escape them.
If you like car chases (I’m not a
fan) and lots of gun battles and fighting (again, I’m not a fan) then this is
the film for you. I don’t like either of
those things, but still found it surprisingly entertaining and managed to get
past the accent! Defo worth a watch.
There are quite a few other films
out now, or due to come out that I definitely won’t be watching:
- American Reunion
- How I spent my summer vacation
- Piranha 3DD
I’ve absolutely no interest in
those teeny, collegey, boobs and ass films.
So I won’t be reviewing those!
On the other hand, there are some
great looking ones coming up such as:
- Men in Black
- Snow White and the Huntsman
- Prometheus
Really looking forward to
those. Right Lovelies, that’s me for
today. Until next time, be
fabulous!
Lots of love
Jx
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