THANK YOU! You Lovely People!

Well my lovelies … yesterday, ‘Tales of a High Heeled Honey’ reached the 800 hit mark! WOW … that’s so AMAZING!

A huge THANK YOU again to all of you for your continued support and your fantastic feedback … I must be doing something right then! (Now that makes a nice change I can tell ya!)

I’ve now got readers from:

UK (obviously)

USA

Spain

Russia

Germany

Netherlands

UAE

Ireland

Australia

Canada

Italy

Unbelievable! 

I also need to put a little request out to you, my lovely readers …I’m always looking for ideas of things to put in my blog to keep it as interesting as possible, therefore, please let me know if you have any requests for topics you’d like so see me cover … you can leave comments by clicking on the ‘comments’ bit at the bottom of each post (please be aware that I am able to vet them before they go live!), or mail me at handbag-gladrag@hotmail.co.uk.  Alternatively, if you know of something that I’ve been up to, but I haven’t done a blog about it (believe it or not, I have a shocking memory!), please let me know.

 

Thank you again you lovely, lovely people and remember, be fabulous!

Lots and lots and lots of love

Jx

Asian vs Caucasian Dating - Part 2

I found the second part of my post, yay! Back to Asian vs Caucasian dating ….

Traditional Matchmakers

Firstly, obviously there’s the traditional matchmaker … usually a family member who you give all your details to eg:

• Height
• Weight (yes WEIGHT!)
• Skin colour (light coloured skin is highly prized)
• Dress size (honestly! … dress size is really important to prospective husbands, apparently it’s fine for an Asian girl to be overweight after she’s married and I quote, “No-body cares what you look like after your married, you can put as much weight on as you want, as long as you’re thin when you get married”!!!! OMG!)
• Job
• Salary etc

And you give them a list of what you are looking for in your partner including job type (ie professional) and income … yes, income!  Caste isn’t so much of an issue, as they are family, (I’m not going to go into Caste here, suffice to say that’s it’s a class system, similar to our working/middle/upper class, only more complex … Google it if you want to know more) so will be aware of your caste. It’s still really important to marry within your caste, however, I do know of girls who’ve married lower than their caste and their families have come round … eventually!  It wasn’t easy for them though.

The Matchmaker will then go away and match you with someone suitable.  Pictures and telephone numbers will then be swapped and if you like each other after seeing their picture/first phone call, a meeting will be arranged where you meet them, not on your own, but your whole family will meet their whole family … no pressure then!  If you like each other, then it’s pretty much a done deal there and then and you could be married within a few months!

Community Matchmakers

Then there are matchmakers in the community … I love this one … some local shopkeepers have ‘Books’ which contain the details of all the eligible bachelors and females within the community … containing every bit of info you’d ever need, caste, height, weight, clothes size, income, job, University degree, inside leg measurement (nah, not really, I made that one up) and you pay them to find you a match.  If they find someone suitable, then same as above, you meet them with your whole family and theirs bla bla bla.

Back to the conversation I was having with my friends … we couldn’t talk about arranged marriages without asking about forced arranged marriages (you hear so much on the news about the most awful things happening to women forced into marriage, so while I had the opportunity, I asked … plus, my friends are used to me asking questions, I’m fascinated by different cultures and am forever asking them stuff, so they don’t mind).  Apparently, yes of course forced arranged marriages do happen and more often than you’d like to think, but luckily not in their families. 

Despite the use of Matchmakers being commonplace in the Asian community, I think my Asian friends would all agree that they would far rather find their own partners because they can do it in their own time and there isn’t as much pressure.  Often they don’t tell their parents if they’ve been dating someone unless they are absolutely sure they’re going to marry them!

I love having friends from different cultures … it really opens up your thinking and, as I’ve mentioned above, it gives you a great chance to get underneath the stereotype and ask as many probing questions as you want … hopefully without offending anyone!

In the next few weeks, I’ll get into the Asian dating site stuff and give you some real dating experiences that make my dating escapades look like a Disney Film with a Fairytale Ending! Lol

Until then, be fabulous lovely people.

Lots of love

Jx

I Love Films

I was going to post the second part of my Asian vs Caucasian Dating story today, but I can't find where I've saved it (don't worry - not that you were - it'll turn up) and thought I'd do a quick film review instead!

I don’t know if I’ve mentioned but I absolutely love films.  Love Love Love them and I’m not really that picky about the types of films I watch.  There’s just something wonderful about going to the piccies (movies for my American friends) that’s just so fabulous.  I don’t know whether it’s the fact that nothing else matters whilst you’re in the cinema ... the whole world is blocked out and you get totally absorbed in the film (providing that it’s a good one) ... it’s bordering on magical!  (Is that sad?  Hmmmmmmm I dunno ... and actually don’t really care!)

I’m not particularly bothered about genre (although I’m not a huge fan of war films or, gritty reality type British films – far too real for me, I like a bit of escapism and a really good story) I do love a good old film, in fact all of my most favourite films are real oldies.  In no particular order:

·         Some Like it Hot

·         Alfie (the original, not that crappy version with Jude Law ... that’s just nasty)

·         Breakfast at Tiffanys

·         Gentlemen Prefer Blondes

·         Brief Encounter

·         Now, Voyager

·         Plus a whole raft of Ealing comedies and anything with Peter Sellers in (pre 1970s)

My absolute perfect afternoon is watching an old film at the cinema, like it’s supposed to be seen.  My local cinema used to run old films once a week ... there was just nothing like watching ‘Breakfast at Tiffanys’ and other such oldies on the Big Screen ... loved it.  Sadly, they don’t seem to be doing it anymore and I’m not aware of anywhere else that does ... if you know, please let me know!

So, because I go to the cinema at least once a week, I decided to by an unlimited card - £14.99 per month to watch as many films as you like.  Bargain! I’ve seen 4 this weekend!  On second thoughts, I’m not so sure that it was a good idea ... I may never see daylight again and as I’ve moved on from my love of pick n mix and I’m now totally addicted to Hot Dogs and Peanut M&Ms, there’s a very real chance I’ll end up hugely overweight too!  Oooooo that’ll be a nice look ... my eyes will start to get bigger and I’ll develop big black bags under them (like that girl from that book we all read in the 80’s ... ‘Flowers in the Attic’) and my ass will spread so that I’ll have to take up two seats! Lmao ... don’t think there’s really much chance of that, but hey!

So what’ve I seen this week? 

Hugo – Meant to be a kids film by Martin Scorsese – now I usually really love his films (Gangs of New York is a total classic and I’ll never understand why that was so under rated) but this, whilst cinematically absolutely beautiful, the story just didn’t work and was really tedious in places ... if you’re thinking of taking small children and they don’t have the best attention span, I think they’ll find it quite hard going, I did ... in fact, I don’t know whether it was because I had quite a tough week last week and I was shattered, but I did feel my eyes closing a few times ... if it’s a good film, that never happens, no matter how tired I am! 

The Thing – I believe is a prequel of the 80s film with Kurt Russell (or so the guy who sold me my ticket told me ... I can’t remember it).  Anyway, it was really the typical alien monster tale, you know how it goes ... spaceship is found buried deep in the ice somewhere, alien creature is found buried, is dug out then wreaks havoc.  In my opinion, not very scary, although a bit gory and not a patch on the Alien/Predator films (however, there were 3 teenage boys sitting behind me to screamed like girls a couple of times ... that frightened me more than the film!).  Worth seeing though, although probably wait and see it on DVD.

Dream House – This is the film that Daniel Craig and Rachel Weisz apparently met and fell in love on.  Anyway, it’s had lousy reviews (I never take much notice of reviewers - and here I am giving your my views - they slated two of my most favourite films of this year – The Rite and The Priest – so if I fancy something, I’ll make my own mind up!)  I actually quite liked it ... although, don’t see the trailer if you don’t want to know what happens ... they give the biggest part of the film away in the trailer ... mad!  Don’t know why they did that, but there were still quite a few twists in it that I didn’t see coming.  I enjoyed it, worth a look.

My Week with Marilyn – My favourite film for ages.  I really liked it – I’ve been looking forward to seeing it ... I love Marilyn Monroe and am fascinated with her mad life.  Michelle Williams played a really good part and it was actually a quite intelligent film with a good script, some lovely costumes and beautifully shot.  I can highly recommend it.

This weekend I’m looking forward to seeing Puss in Boots (you’ve gotta love the Shrek films, so this is bound to be good) and maybe, New Year’s Eve, although I believe that’s very like Valentine’s Day and I wasn’t a fan of that.  However, as I’ve already got my money back on my ‘Anytime’ card, I might as well check everything out ... God Bless My Waistline!

Until next time, have fun lovely people and be fabulous.

Lots of love

Jx

Eyebrow Tattoo Update

 

I thought I’d give you a quick update on the eyebrow situation ... as you’ll recall, I was supposed to be going for my follow up appointment last Friday.  However, I got a phone call on Tuesday from the Spa to say that Nilam was unavailable on Friday and could they re-arrange for the New Year!  Very annoying when I’m following her tweets and she’s quite open about where she is and what she’s doing!  Remember how I always bang on about the importance of customer service ...  Well now I have to take another day off in January and as I work for myself I don’t get paid for the days I don’t work – so all in all, that’ll be 3 days lost on eyebrows! ... Arrrrrggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhh these are turning into the most expensive eyebrows of all time!

My re-arranged appointment is now 16 January ... on the upside, I go on holiday between then and now (Caribbean again baby, yipeeeee) and I’m told they can fade a bit in the sun ...

Until next time lovely people, be fabulous.

Lots of love

Jx

Caucasian Vs Asian Dating

I've been thinking of some different topics for my blog and happened to be having lunch last week with some Asian friends.  We were having a good old girlie gossip and got on to the subject of dating.  We love this topic (nearly as much as eyebrows! lol) ... I’m always totally incredulous about how it works, The Asian Way!  You think us Caucasian girlies have a hard time of it, you ain’t heard nothing yet!  I’ve asked if I can share some of their stories … as they’re quite something … to which the reply was, “Yes, if you don’t mention names!”  A fair trade in my view! 

I’ve struggled with how best to tackle this, as in how to structure the info, as there’s so flaming much of it and it’s all a bit ad hoc ie there’s not always a story attached, so I’m just gonna launch into it and see what happens …

Asian Dating

Dating, Asian style, couldn’t be more different than Caucasian.  There are some things we have in common like Internet Dating (which is similar in name alone from what I can see), which I’ll go into later, then there are the traditional Matchmakers.  But it’s the whole dating process that shocks the hell out of me and the directness of it all!

When an Asian man or woman decides that they want to get married, there’s no messing around with unnecessary dating (I probably need to put some context around it all here … if a girl isn’t married by 30, she’s on the shelf and is pretty much looked down upon and classed as an old maid – however, a man can get married at whatever age he wants … usually when he’s got ‘partying’ with Caucasian girls out of his system!  It’s extremely rare for an Asian man to marry a Caucasian woman or indeed and Asian woman that he’s had a casual relationship with - but when they decide it’s time to marry, they don’t mess around), therefore, they ask the most amazing questions upfront. 

Straight away, from the very first conversation, both sides will be ascertaining whether the person is marriage material or not … in the first conversation they’ve had with a man my friends have been asked:

• How many relationships have you had?
• How long did they last?
• Were you physical with your partner(s) (it’s the ideal to marry a virgin … yes, honestly!)
• Can you cook? (Asian men do not do housework/cooking AT ALL!)
• How many children do you want?
• Will you stop working after we’re married? (and yes, they use ‘we’)

That said, my friends will think nothing of asking:

• What’s your job?
• How much do you earn?
• What financial plans have you made for the future
• Where will we be living?

Both sides will have no issue whatsoever in talking about marriage plans in the first conversation … I’m not even talking about first meeting here, I’m talking about first conversation!  Quite often, as my friends recall, men have said "when we get married ..." numerous times in the first conversation - which they admit that it can be a bit overwhelming!  I find this incredible, I’ve gone out with men for years who’ve got hot under the collar when you say the ‘m’ word!  Could you imagine if you mentioned marriage to a Caucasian male, or female for that matter, the first time you speak to them … well I can guarantee that you wouldn’t be speaking to them again (me included!)  In some ways, you’ve got to admire it though… at least everyone knows where they stand right from the get go!

With regard to where an Asian person would find their ideal husband/wife, well obviously I’ve mentioned Asian dating sites and there are the usual introductions by friends, meeting people at University/College, meeting someone at a wedding (they’re all quite a popular ways to meet someone in both cultures I think), but there are also Matchmakers …

Unfortunately, I’m stuck for time again folks, so I’ll continue the tale tomorrow.  Until then, be good and be fabulous, lovely people.

Jx

Face Tattoo’s Hurt! (Even semi-perm ones!)

I can’t believe I haven’t told you about my eyebrows yet!  I’ve had them tattoo’d!!!!!  Ouch!

For years I’ve wanted to have them done, after major over plucking in the 80’s and subsequent waxing mishaps made by incompetent therapists over the years, I’m left with very sparse eyebrows which I have to pencil in.  I’ve been thinking of having semi-permanent tattoos done for ages but have never found anyone who I’d trust to do them. 

I knew of a few people who’d had them done, but I have to be honest, they’re all pretty awful.  Either those hideous big black square brows that look really unrealistic or totally the wrong shape or colour making the person look permanently startled or really angry!  (I had those HD Brows a few months ago ... dunno if you’ve heard of them ... think I may have mentioned them in an earlier post, but they kinda ended up like those big, thick, square ‘Scouse Brows’ ... watch ‘Desperate Scousewives’ which started on Monday and you’ll  understand what I mean .. the ugliest brows I’ve ever seen).

So, how did I end up having my brows done by the country’s leading eyebrow tattoo type lady?  Well, if you’ve been reading my posts, you’ll know that I’m really not good with poor customer service and shoddy workmanship, especially when it’s something as visible as your eyebrows ...

I was having a chat with Mehreen about my brows ...  I don’t know if you’ve guessed this, but Mehreen is Asian and I don’t know if you’ve ever noticed this too, but I’ve never seen an Asian lady that doesn’t have the most fabulously shaped brows (apparently it’s an absolute must and according to Mehreen, “There’s no excuse for bad brows”! I do love her ... she makes me laugh!).  Well, when I mentioned I fancied having my brows tatoo’d, she immediately told me that I should get them done with Nilam Patel, as she knew someone who’d had it done with her and her brows were amazing.

So without further ado, we did a quick Google check ... turns out that she does the brows of everyone from Kylie and Dannii to GaGa, Katie Price (hmmmmm) loads of people you’d know from lots of well known TV shows and she’s THE Brow Lady on XFactor ... the very one that sorted out Cher’s crazy brows ... do you remember them?  She’d shaved of her natural brows and pencilled spidery thin brows in the middle of her forehead!  Now I don’t watch the XFactor, but I remember her crazy brows!

So, I promptly rang the Spa number (not a salon this time ... a Spa!) and was told that there was a waiting list until January 2012 and I should ring back in October to make an appointment ... this was March 2011!! OMG! Apparently, she had so many celeb clients and was so busy with her other company ... yes you guessed it “HD Browns” ... that it would be nearly a year before she’d be able to fit me in.  Now I must point out here, that this procedure is not cheap ... decidedly not cheap, so I really didn’t think I’d have to wait that long.  Anyway, I asked if I could leave my number in case they had a cancellation.  The receptionist said that it was unlikely, but yes, she would keep my number.

Well, we kinda forgot all about it and I continued to fill my brows in using Illamasque eyebrow cake and their wonderful angled eyebrow bush (available at Selfridges ... thanks for the tip, Mehreen - both products are quite amazing actually ... they beat pencils hands down ... very precise!).  Anyway, at the beginning of October, I got a call out of the blue from the Spa asking if I was free on 21^st as there was an appointment available.  Well, of flamin course I was available!  So it was booked there and then, together with an appointment 6 weeks later for a top up.  Phew!  I was out and about when I got the call and was so excited that the first thing I did was ring Mehreen to tell her (she loves that stuff as much as I do!).  We’re both girlie girlies ... what can I say!!! Lol

So the momentous day arrived and as I had to travel to Milton Keynes and get there for 11.00, I got up super early (I do loads of travelling and MK is only a couple of hours away, but cos you never know what the traffic’s doing and my ‘issue’ with lateness, I left about 7.30 ... and got there at 9.30! Nutter!  After a stop off at a service station for coffee, I finally arrived at the Spa for 10.45 ... filled the necessary paperwork in and had a ‘numbing’ cream applied to my brows.

 

When Nilam arrived I was quite shocked at how small she was, she was tiny (I guess people always look bigger on telly!), but she is extremely pretty (great skin), with fab brows (obv) and absolutely lovely ... such a sweet person, I liked her straight away ... even more so once she started to tell me some fab stories!

I had my consultation, we agreed to keep my brows the same size as they currently were when I’d filled them in, so that I didn’t get scared when they were done!  She said that if, when they’d settled down I wanted them thicker, then she would do it at the top up.  So I settled down to an hour’s worth of pain!

Boy did it hurt ... despite the fact that she kept putting numbing cream on.  The hour went unbelievable quickly ... she was so funny ... I loved it (not the pain though!). When she’d finished, they were THE most fabulous shape, but extremely black!  Like, CRAZYILY black.  She said that I should go really heavy on the eye makeup for the next week or so – like ‘going out’ eyes heavy – to counteract the darkness of them. I was told to put cream on them at least 3 times a day, that the scab (yes, scab!) would drop off after about a week (hmmmmm nice!) and they’d look really pale for a while.  However, over the next month the pigment would come through in time for my top up, 6 weeks later.

Gotta be honest, that week was a nightmare ... you obviously (like any newly done tattoo) can’t pick at it ... and when you’ve got flakey bits in your brows, it’s hard to resist ... it also doesn’t look particularly attractive! lol

.... It was all so worth it though ... I had such a fantastic day ... I loved every minute of it and my brows look fab, although I think I may go a little bit thicker when I have my top up ... which I’m so looking forward to!

Anyway, as usual, must rush ... until next time be fabulous, lovely people.

Lots of love

Jx

Semi Perm Lashes!

Earlier on this year, I had semi perm eyelashes ... these are individual lashes which are glued one by one to your own lashes ... and if done well, look fabulous I must have had them on for about 6 months (you have to have them topped up every 10 days or so cos they come off when you use your natural lash) but had them taken off when I went on holiday. They’re far too much hassle to be bothered with on hols as you can’t get them wet and have to cleanse around them ... not an ideal match with sea, pool and suntan lotion!

Anyway, because they are quite a faff, both managing them daily, having them filled every 10 days and of course let’s not forget the cost, I never got round to having them put on again.  However, I was at the salon last week and the owner mentioned that they had a half price offer on lashes and I should have them done.  I must point out here that the lady who used to do them left (the owner’s daughter actually) ... she was a total expert at them ... amazing, really quick and they were perfect, every time ... it would take her about 40 mins to do a full set and they were magnificent!

Well, despite the fact that the ‘professional’ had left, I thought that half price was a pretty good bargain and as I’d have them taken off for my holidays (in a few weeks), I didn’t mind paying the price or taking the time to have them done.

So last Saturday, 20th I booked in.  Mistake ... big mistake!  When will I ever learn that if something is really cheap in comparison to what everyone else is charging, there’s a reason.  In this case, the reason was that the lady who did them, quite obviously, was a trainee who had been taught by the Salon owner’s daughter before she left ... therefore, not even professionally trained.  Had I known that before, I wouldn’t have bothered.  Now, I know people have to learn how to do things ... they just don’t need to learn how to do them on me, thank you very much!  I’d rather pay full price and have it done properly rather than have something done badly, cheaply. 

I arrived at my appointment at 11.00 am ... guess what time I left?????  1.00 pm!  Two friggin hours! TWO FRIGGIN HOURS!  Who the hell has 2 hours free like that? I certainly don’t.  When I looked at the lashes, disappointment doesn’t become to cover it.   I have two ways of describing what they looked like ... you can choose for yourself which you like best, cos they both sum it up well:

1.   An extremely inebriated spider

2.   A spider on ice

Well, you get the idea ... they were all over the place ... and there were gaps!  Appalling!  When the therapist asked me what I thought, I was so desperate to get outta there, I just said they were ‘nice’ ... threw the money at her and literally ran out!  I was so disappointed ... I went straight to Boots and bought some single lashes to fill in where she’d missed.  When I saw Mehreen a few days later ... her reaction was to laugh and tell me to ‘Get them off’!!!!  Oh dear!  Mehreen is usually incredibly polite so for her to say that, they must have been bad!

So I had to bite the bullet and make an appointment to have them taken off.  I tried to get someone else at the salon to do it, but was told that they all work for themselves and therefore were each responsible for their own mistakes! Believe it or not, I really do hate to complain (I guess it’s a British thing) and would have preferred it if I could have had someone else to take them off and just not gone back to that girl, but that wasn’t going to be possible!

I turned up at the Salon early for my appointment (as usual ... can’t help myself!) and was told that the Therapist (loose use of the word) was running late.  She turned up 20 minutes late – I’d been there 10 minutes early – and didn’t even apologise ... I’m not good with stuff like that.  I’m all about excellent customer service.

The Salon owner looked at my lashes and said she thought they were fine!  I couldn’t believe it ... I said, “You’re kidding, right?” ... nope, she wasn’t kidding.  She said she thought there was nothing wrong with them.  I told her I thought they were appalling, she just blinked ... blinked FFS!!!!  Aggggggggghhhhhhhh  I just knew then that she was protecting her income and there was no way I was going to be offered my money back ... unbelievable ... total lack of any kinda customer satisfaction! 

When the Therapist had said hello to everyone, showed them her nails and had a bit of a gossip, she was ready for me ... another 10 mins ... OMG, I was ready to burst I was getting so angry (not like me, but as I say I just hate to be kept waiting and totally detest bad customer service).  She looked at my lashes and I told her that I thought they were all over the place and that there were lashes she’d missed.  She said that she could fill them in ... I said, “Take em off!”  So another half an hour and two very watery irritated eyes later, the bloody things were off!  One saving grace ... she didn’t charge me ... actually, I’d loved to have seen her try ... I’d have gone berserk!

So it’s back to normal lashes again, at least until after my hols ... or unless I’m going out and I’ll put strip ones on.  Ho Hum ... and today’s lesson, if something seems too good to be true ... it usually is!

Until next time, take care lovely people and be fabulous!

Lots of Love

Jx